I was recently thinking about fasting. I haven’t been feeling great health wise and have enjoyed a little more than my share of the various office treats that are left as I head out for the night. We keep talking about gyms but I prefer dragging my feet to working out.
I have struggled to connect with God in the way I would desire as going to church makes me feel more busy than enriched and life is too busy lately to make it to The Table. Plus all my church energy has been spent on the 3pm community meal.
But honestly I have been thinking of fasting as budgeting.
And that’s not really what it is supposed to be for.
I often do this … and when I do fast, I don’t give away what I saved by not eating, I just spend it on other things. It makes me wonder if I have ever fasted for the right reasons.
Reasons like: to give to those who would consider my fasting starving or just making ends meet. As I look at my debts I give time instead of the money I save. I don’t have money I think but then I think about how much the beautiful Hannah and I make. How houses, babies, and exotic international trips seem like idiotic monetary decisions.
Then I realize it is because I am not trusting. Not sacrificing. Not submitting. Which makes me respect other religions. Not to bash my own faith system, but I get a lot of room to fail, pass, procrastinate and forget. My Muslim brothers give up a month of time and meals. My Catholic sisters give up 40 days of food and energy.
As I look to the future weeks I realize that I should do something different. I should give up truly. I should really fast…at the worst time of year. Because we are about to celebrate the birth of the one who embodied sacrifice. With incarnational presence and substitutionary forgiveness.
I think I could sacrifice a little for that. To commemorate the birth of the One I call Saviour.
More on what that looks like in the coming days. (They are written so will actually post in the next few days.)