Lately I have been feeling occupied with life.  As mentioned often before I am tired.  I am in a constant state of tired or sadness as some people call it.  I started eating right and working out to combat it and…I am still tired.  I try my best to find time to rest between working, volunteering, fellowshipping, communing, hanging out, and writing.  All of which I for the most part enjoy doing and think am good at finding rest but I am still tired.

In a recent chat with a friend I expressed I have not being sleeping well.  He asked what was going on, what I was thinking about.  I replied “nothing”.  Then proceeded to unpack how I am not sure what to be when I grow up, where to settle as a grown up after a recent visit with the nieces, who to grow up with, and how to grow up while I am in debt.  He laughed and said, “that’s the big five”.  I said I keep feeling like I know what I am supposed to do, but no one really seems to agree.  Few people seem to hear me.

Lately I have been feeling like my life is completely monotonous.  I want more. And the desire to feel like I am doing something with most of my life makes me want to sit in a city square.  Occupy a city if you will…if only there were people doing that.  People that were sick and tired of struggling to do what is right.  Struggling to be heard and are tired of giving up.  Tired of working just to pay a student loan which only provided them a piece of paper that isn’t worth much as the job they desire required experience or a couple more pieces of paper.  Tired of seeing people on television spewing talk the direct opposite of their desires.  Worried that their children will be stuck with not only their debts but having to provide for them sooner rather than later, if things don’t change.

This is why when I was riding the bus into work this morning and it was diverted because of the “protesters” I was happy.  And when I walked into work and heard people discussing why things happen and the smut that is on television from fourth meals or cheap clothes or half naked people driving cars, I smiled. Or when I rode back home and noticed semi-permanent tents, I looked at the middle aged woman across from me and smirked.I salute those getting their voices heard.  I am just sad they had to risk arrest or make signs or sleep in the cold rain for someone to notice them!

For more info check out any of these links…and open your eyes!










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